So Damn Lucky

To My P.I.C.'s: My Partners in Crime:

First order of business, Happy Christmas people. I hope your day was magical, full of holiday cheer, excitement, and laughter. I do hereby declare that laughter really is the best medicine as studies have statistically shown time and time again. For all those degenerates out there who have the personality of Scrooge (i.e., Ryan Paluf), I would desperately like to encourage you to turn your frown...upside down. If you are in fact a Scrooge/Paluf-like character, you had better hope that you have at the very least 50-60% of the good looks and illuminating physical attributes that I possess. Again, just to reiterate, the 50-60% is a bare minimum percentile. Generally, with my clients I would prefer that they actually possess upwards of roughly 80% of my key, highly-coveted physical features. I would like to set the record straight that no one truly is, or will ever be for that matter, on my level as far as general sex appeal and overall awesomeness. Not to blow smoke up my own bottom, but I feel as though I would be remiss if I did not mention that both my body and my mind have now been consistently ranked #1 among all leading competitors in its respective class for 22 years straight (i.e., since my birth) by J.D. Power & Associates. Each year's trophy is perched proudly on my rich mahogany mantle above my rare granite fireplace.

I would now at this time like to apologize to anyone who actually read the preceding information. Every once in a blue moon (essentially everyday), I make some type of statement(s) that generally involve just how good looking I am, or how it is literally not possible in this crazy, mixed-up world to achieve a level of awesomeness that exceeds my level. Reason being, there has actually not been a day that has gone by in my young life that my coolness level has not increased by at least a few coolness points by day's end. Having said that, since I [obviously] already started at a coolness level above everyone else, that leaves a 0% chance that anyone can even attempt to sniff my awesome levels as mine are increasing exponentially as each day draws to a close. So, sorry that I am really not sorry. "If it makes you feel any better, I forgot my reading glasses" (Home Alone).

Okay, so this time I am really apologizing for all of that bogus junk that was just written. If you actually read all of it, I am really sorry. If you actually read all of that tomfoolery and also laughed at any point, I am sorry again, but also do not blame you because I believe at least some of it was funny. That is highly up for debate, I suppose. The real reason I started writing all of that (aside from the fact that I am a strange dude) is because I think sometimes I can be overly self-conscious and worry about things that are just simply not worth my time or energy. I find myself joking around like that probably far too often. Perhaps the jokes serve as some sort of defense mechanism, a little protective shield that I put up when something in my mind is not clicking or agreeing with me.

As each day passes, and I become a bit wiser about the world we live in, I feel as though everyone has their own hand-crafted, customized defensive shield that they have learned to hide behind in times of need. It is in the nature of all human beings to resort to these defensive tactics when we are involved in a situation that we feel is uncomfortable and exploits our individual weaknesses, which are different for everyone. It is in these times that one should be aware of and recognize the moment that you are about to resort to your comfort zone and timidly hide behind your own personalized shield of defense that you have learned to rely on time and time again. It is in these times that one needs to learn to set aside your shield once it is out, and learn to continue on without it. Learning to set your shield aside and expand your comfort zone is how you grow as a person. You have to learn to rely on the uniqueness of "You." Everything about you, including good, bad, or indifferent qualities, is what makes you..."You." You must learn to recognize and embrace everything about you that makes you..."You."

It should be noted on record that while I am attempting to preach all of this, I am still so far away from truly appreciating everything about me that makes me the one unique, Bradley Thomas Mattson. However, I have been getting much better at appreciating my little quirks and nerdy tendencies that make me Bradley.

To add a few closing thoughts, I would just like to say how important it is to learn to become comfortable in your own skin. This is much harder for some people to learn than it will be for others. Some people, including myself at times, are just simply not happy with what they look like, who they are, or who they think they are starting to become. If you do not like something about yourself, you do have the ability to transform that certain characteristic into something different that you will actually like. Of course, it will always remain that there are just some things that are simply out of our hands. So, learn to act on the elements that are under our control, and more importantly learn to embrace and accept the elements that we do not have control over. Because, after all, that which we do not have control over is what makes you so unique. Finally, keep in mind the idea that who is anyone to actually judge your own personal value or worth. People love to put other people down. I am guilty of it myself. Do not let anyone try to put you down, ever. Do not let anyone try to tell you that you cannot accomplish something, ever. Who is anybody to try to define you. Remember that when it is all said and done and your time here on earth comes to a close, you never want to look back and wish that you had done it differently.


QUOTE OF THE WEEK:

"Hey, you wanna see the new Tweeder end zone dance?"

-Charlie Tweeder (Varsity Blues)


CLOSING THOUGHTS:

Get some.



First Name "Ever," Last Name "Greatest,"

Meatson, out.